rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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