And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
