whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
