He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
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i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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