fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
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