i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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