Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
