xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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