eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
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