I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Terrible idea I love it
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize