On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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