dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
