either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
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Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize