i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
