Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
