he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
