I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
