Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
