take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
