Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Is it because I queefed?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
