No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
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