the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.