Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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