So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
