awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize