Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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