where does the pee come out of this thing
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
