I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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