): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
