You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
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