first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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