grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
