look no pants
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
