you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn off my feet"
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
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