So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
