Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Watching her eat just hurts me
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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