Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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