u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
