Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  Its about making memories worth repressing

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  (818): Its about making memories worth repressing http://tfl.nu/5fiw
  Replies (1) Good night (2693) Bad night (568)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?

  (1-502): View more from Kentucky

  eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.

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  (502): So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut? (1-502): eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material. http://tfl.nu/j1ps
  Replies (19) Good night (4941) Bad night (1060)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"

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  (612): He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?" http://tfl.nu/lotk
  Replies (10) Good night (3240) Bad night (1134)
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  (415): View more from California

  All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk

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  (415): All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk http://tfl.nu/vf88
  Replies (2) Good night (1854) Bad night (1167)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.

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  (214): I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good. http://tfl.nu/2il8
  Replies (12) Good night (2592) Bad night (986)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.

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  (319): As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em. http://tfl.nu/jzfe
  Replies (2) Good night (1975) Bad night (890)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?

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  (205): They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level? http://tfl.nu/pz2g
  Replies (6) Good night (1782) Bad night (621)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous

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  (614): My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous http://tfl.nu/febg
  Replies (5) Good night (543) Bad night (1861)
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  (551): View more from New Jersey

  Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners

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  (551): Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners http://tfl.nu/77j3
  Replies (4) Good night (1375) Bad night (357)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"

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  (314): Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face" http://tfl.nu/5wsk
  Replies (3) Good night (1071) Bad night (296)
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  (626): View more from California

  I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?

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  (626): I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/9qof
  Replies (2) Good night (743) Bad night (243)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.

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  (303): No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities. http://tfl.nu/n27f
  Replies (1) Good night (569) Bad night (236)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.

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  (281): Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky. http://tfl.nu/g7xl
  Replies (1) Good night (665) Bad night (249)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"

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  (314): i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis" http://tfl.nu/xf6m
  Replies (3) Good night (354) Bad night (248)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.

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  (863): I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't. http://tfl.nu/8mvt
  Replies (2) Good night (662) Bad night (151)

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