I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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