Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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