8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
third nipple confirmed
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize