I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
