You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
In America we eat man semen.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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