He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
