Nicole vs. Life
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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