She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
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Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
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Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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