how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
