Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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