people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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