Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
